[F4M] [Script Offer] I Can’t Let You Give Up – I Love You [Friends to Lovers] [Serious Illness] [Comfort] [Confession] Mentions of [Death], [Suicide], and [Mental Health] [L-bombs] [Romantic] [Emotional] [Vanilla] Slow, Sensual [Cowgirl] [Creampie] [We'll Get Through This Together] “So… you’re sick. I know that’s scary, and I know the treatments sound even scarier. But… listen to me. You *can’t* give up. I won’t let you. You and me… we’ll get through this together. I’ll be with you every step of the way. Because I love you. I’ve never told you, but I’ve always loved you. And together, we can overcome anything. I’ll always be here for you. Now, come here… and let me show you.” A woman rushes to her best friend’s house after receiving a terrifying message: he’s been diagnosed with a very serious disease. Even worse, he’s thinking about foregoing treatment. She’s devastated; how can he give up? Hasn’t he realized that she loves him? Doesn’t he remember all the times he convinced her to hold on to hope? Now it’s her turn to be strong for him. Can she screw up the courage to confess her feelings? How far will she go to persuade him that he’s not alone? Thanks for clicking on my script! This one is… a bit of a doozy. It’s long, and it deals with some heavy emotional themes. For those reasons, I wouldn’t be surprised if no one wanted to touch it. But at the very least, give it a read: I’m very proud of it, and I hope you’ll fall in love with this character as much as I have. Any interested performers are welcome to edit/improvise to their hearts’ content. If approaching it from a different angle makes it easier to channel the emotions, go for it! *Asterisks are for emphasis* [Brackets are for direction] Line breaks are just there to make scanning easier – improvise with pauses all you like. [Tonal advice] This character is trying her best to be strong for her friend, but this is the worst day of her life. Even when she’s not being outwardly emotional, emotions are bubbling just under the surface. ------[START]------- <(optional) thunderstorm sounds throughout> [numb, a bit breathless] Uh… hey. I’m… I’m sorry, I got your message while I was driving and… I dunno. I guess I kinda freaked out, and before I realized what I was doing… I was here. I just… I really needed to see you. Is that okay? Okay. Well, uh, it’s kinda… raining out here. Can I come in? I… guess we have a lot to talk about, don’t we? Thanks. I’m just the tiniest bit soaked. Let me take my jacket off. Okay. I, uh… I need to sit down. [Hesitantly] So… what’s up? God, that’s… I’m sorry. I don’t know what to say. I feel so awkward all of a sudden. And that’s… *so* crazy. I’ve known you for… I don’t even *know* how many years, and I’ve never felt awkward around you before. I mean, we talked just last night, and everything was normal! I dunno. I guess things have… changed now, haven’t they? Like… is there any way for this to be a normal conversation? I guess not. [reluctantly] I don’t want to talk about this. I really, really don’t. But I don’t think we have a choice. So… I listened to your message. You’re… sick. Okay. Um… how sick? [flatly – she’s trying hard to remain calm] …oh. Yeah. Yeah, that’s… pretty sick. [struggling for words] Oh god. I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, I just… I don’t know how to react to this. I mean, when did you… how long have you known you were sick? *That* long. Okay. But, then… why didn’t you tell me? I mean, I noticed that you weren’t eating as much lately, and I wondered why you kept leaving the bar so early in the evening, but… Jesus. I never expected anything like this. I… I don’t know what to do. So… what’s next? Is it, like… I don’t know the word. Operable? Can it be cured? I don’t know how this stuff works, but there has to be *something* we can do, right? [denial] Sometimes doctors mess up diagnoses, you know, so maybe you should go get a second opinion. Yeah, okay, one of my old roommates is a doctor, a really good one, so I’ll call her and get you a referral to a specialist and— Oh. What’s that? The… doctor’s prognosis? Um. Okay. What… what does it say? [quietly] Yeah. Sure. I’ll read it. [voice shaking] No. No. No no, that’s… that’s not right. They made a mistake. Okay? That’s not right. You, no, you can’t, this is… oh my god. [quiet, utter devastation] This can’t be happening. [she’s angry – she doesn’t know why] Why… why didn’t you ******* tell me? Huh? Why not? I have been your best friend for years. *Years*. We went to high school together, we went to college together, we moved to the same city… and we promised to tell each other *everything*. Every promotion at work, every bad day, every… gross Tinder story. But when something important happens to you — when you start suspecting that you’re… sick — you don’t mention it to me? **** you. ***** you*! Didn’t you think I would want to know? That I *deserved* to know? Why would you hide this from me? Tell me. *Tell me*! I’m… I’m so sorry. Shit. I didn’t mean that. I didn’t mean that at all. [realizing her words hurt him] No. Oh no, no no no. Oh, sweetie… no, you didn’t do anything wrong. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that. I really didn’t mean it. I’m just… I’m not thinking clearly. Listen. It’s okay. It’s really okay. You’re telling me now, and… that’s all that matters. Okay? I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry. I just can’t believe this. It feels like a dream. Like I’ll walk out of this room and… poof. Everything will go back to normal. I’ll wake up in my bed, and I’ll call you to talk about the crazy, terrible nightmare I just had. And you’ll make me forget about it. Just like always. But… we can’t ignore this, can we? [determined] Yeah. Okay. Here’s what we do. That prognosis looks… pretty bad, but did you read the part at the bottom there? There are still treatments. There’s a few in-patient things, and I even saw a couple of experimental trials you could do. You got that really awesome insurance from your new job, and we’ve both been saving up to open our own record store for… what? Six years? So we’re flush. We’ve got plenty of money, and we’re gonna do whatever we can to beat this, okay? We’re gonna keep moving forward. That’s what we’re gonna do. Okay. So let’s call a few of those numbers on the prognosis sheet, and let’s start making some appointments so we can— What? Why not? Well, yeah, I know it’s scary. Sounds like it’ll be… difficult, sure, but… that doesn’t matter. We have to make these calls. It’ll be fine. I’ll call them for you, alright? You don’t have to do anything, you just sit there and tell me— [he tells her he doesn’t want to pursue treatment] [seething – she can’t believe he said that] Don’t say that. Don’t you ever, *ever* say that. Listen to me. Okay? You are being an *idiot* right now. I know you’re scared. Of *course* you’re scared. You’ve come face-to-face with the scariest thing in the world. I get that. I do. But you listen to me *right now*: you are *not* giving up. Do you hear me? Not now, not *ever*. I know you better than anyone in the world, and I *know* that you’re not giving up. [remorsefully – she thinks she might be handling this badly] Shhh. Shhh. It’s okay. I’m sorry I keep shouting. I’m… I’m really, really sorry. God, I’m really screwing this up, aren’t I? This is… clearly terrifying, and I should be comforting you, not… well, whatever I’ve been doing. It’s just… I can’t listen to you talk about… dying. I *won’t*, okay? Hearing you talk about just… turning over? That… that really hurts me, you know? Worse than anything. I just… I don’t know how to handle this. I really don’t. But… I can’t let you give up. I just can’t. The thought of losing you… I don’t know how to explain how that makes me feel. Maybe… Okay. Let me tell you a story. You’ve heard it before, but I want you to really, *really* listen to it this time. Okay? Sit down and… just listen. [reluctant and vulnerable – she’s not sure where this story will lead] Once upon a time, there was a girl. She liked emo bands and dark poetry and… not much else. Certainly not people. And that was fitting, because people didn’t like her, either. She was scared of them, and she didn’t know how to talk to them, and she would… lash out sometimes. She chased everybody away. Her classmates, her family… everybody. She didn’t mean to, but she did. And she got so good at it that she started to believe they would never come back. That she would be alone forever because she *deserved* it. She *knew* she deserved it, and she would *tell* herself that she deserved it every night. The girl started high school, and it kept getting worse. She was… hardly living, really. She went to class and spoke up when she had to, but… all she could see were thunderclouds. Whenever she heard people laughing, she was convinced they were laughing at *her*. That image swirled around in her head, repeating itself over and over – people laughing, people sneering, people wishing she would… disappear. Before long… *she* wished she would disappear, too. And so… she decided to do it. To take matters into her own hands and… disappear. She didn’t know how she was going to do it. She just knew that… she *had* to. Before things got worse. She just… she couldn’t take it anymore, and she was sure that the only thing she could do was… to take the *easy* way out. But then… she met someone. A boy in her class. He was new in town, and he didn’t have any friends, but… he acted like he had nothing to prove. To himself or anybody else. He was just… easy. And to the girl’s surprise… he talked to her. By choice. He sat down next to her during lunch and… just talked. About anything and everything. She showed him her embarrassing emo music, and he liked it. Or pretended to, at least. And bit by bit, she found herself… opening up. She would call him out of nowhere just to talk about something stupid on TV. She would ****** him out to the mall to look at books and make fun of old people. For the first time… things seemed to be looking up. But… the girl was still hurting. It almost hurt worse now – it was bad enough when she felt like she had nothing to lose, but having someone important in her life… she felt unworthy of him. Like she was doomed to disappoint him or hold him back. Like he would eventually realize just how worthless she was and reject her. And that was… unacceptable. She would do anything to avoid that rejection. Anything. [voice breaking – she’s remembering her darkest moment] So… one night, she took some pills. A lot of pills. Every pill she could find. And she texted him one last time to tell him how thankful she was and how much she would miss him. Then… she fell asleep for what she hoped would be the last time. But she woke up. And when she woke up… he was there. He was driving her to the hospital, and he was talking to her. Her mind was fuzzy, and she was drifting in and out, but she could still hear what he was saying. He told her how much he cared about her, how sorry he was for not seeing how much she hurt, how he would do anything – anything in the whole world – to help her get better, and… oh god, he was crying, too, he was trying to stay strong and brave, but he was so, so scared, and he was crying, and… and he reached out and grabbed her hand, and he squeezed it, he squeezed it so hard, like if he just held on tightly enough, he could stop her from slipping away and keep her there by his side forever. It must have worked. She got better, and he was with her all the way. He brought her food and read her books and listened to her tell him about all the pain she had been burying inside her. He listened, and he held her hand, and he looked her in the eye and told her that whenever she felt like laying down and giving up, he would be there to lift her up. [quietly] That’s when she realized… that she loved him. She loved him with all her heart, and she was so ashamed at how much she had hurt him. She realized that he loved her, too. Maybe not in the same way that she loved him, but… it didn’t matter. What did matter was this: if she didn’t learn to love herself, then she might as well call him a liar. If this boy – this brilliant, selfless, genuine, and lovely boy – if he loved her, then there had to be a part of her worth loving. And with his help, she found it. She began to notice the things she was good at. She realized that she loved making people laugh, helping them through their darkest days and giving them hope for tomorrow. She changed. She was happy. Thanks to him. But… she decided never to tell him how much she loved him. She thought that maybe he would figure it out on his own, but… she couldn’t tell him. She could never risk changing the beautiful relationship they shared. She realized she might regret never seeing how much closer they could get… but that would be better than losing him altogether. She didn’t want to change anything. But… I guess sometimes things change all by themselves. [quietly, maybe tearfully] You… you didn’t let me give up. You stood by me during my darkest moment and helped me see the light. I’m here because of you. So I can’t sit here and let you give up on living. Don’t you see that? I can’t let you give up because I… I love you. I always have. You taught me to love myself, and since then… you’ve been the only one for me. All those other guys I dated… I dunno. I thought I couldn’t risk losing you or pushing you away, so I wanted to see if somebody else could make me as happy as you do. But… I was kidding myself. I love you… so completely that it makes me do silly things like that. But I can’t hide it. Not anymore. Not… after this. I need you to know. I love you, and I can’t imagine a world without you. I refuse to. [a little desperate – she *has* to convince him] I know you want to give up. I know these treatments sound… scary and difficult. I… god, I can’t even imagine how this all must feel. But… I’m scared too, you know? And even though it scares me… a *lot*… I have to help you. I *have* to. I’m going to… hold your hand. Just like *this*. Just like you did for me. Just… hold my hand and look at me. You’re not alone. You’re *never* going to be alone. Not anymore. Whatever comes next… I’m going to be right here, right by your side. It’s going to be scary, and it’s going to be hard. But… we’ll be scared together. We’ll push through it together. And we’re going to beat this. Do you hear me? We *are* going to beat this. I know it. I can feel it in my heart. I love you, and… I think you love me too. Our love has cheated death once before. We’re going to do it again. I promise. [whispering] Shh. It’s okay. Everything is going to be okay. I’m here. I… I love you. I love you so much. I’m so sorry this is happening to you. I wish I could take it all away. I’ve never wanted anything more. But… for now, don’t think about it. Just be here. Be here with me. Here… put your hand right here, on my chest. Can you feel that? My heart? It’s beating… really, really fast. It feels like it’s going to burst. It’s been filling up with love for years, now. It’s… overflowing, I guess. [a bit nervous] I want… I want to show you my love. I want to show you how much you mean to me. So you’ll never, ever feel alone. I want to… make you feel good. So when I’m not here, you can still feel me with you. Would… would that be okay? [quiet, understanding] You feel weak? That’s okay. We can be… gentle. I… I’ve always wanted to be, like… gentle and tender with you. It would make me… really, really happy. Just… take your pants off and lay down on the couch. Yeah, just… just like that. Now I’ll take my pants off and just… lay down on top of you. Here, hand me that blanket. I’ll put it over us. There. That’s… that’s perfect. Just you and me, pressed together. I’m so… warm. Inside and out. I… it’s embarrassing, but I’ve imagined laying with you like this, like… hundreds of times. The circumstances are usually a bit happier in my imagination, but… it still feels just as perfect as I thought it would. I felt that. Rubbing against my stomach… are you getting hard for me? Good. I… I can’t even tell you how happy that makes me. I’ve always wanted… to make you hard. This might be an awkward question, but… have you ever thought about this? I mean… you’ve made me wet before. Countless times. I’ve spent so many nights just thinking about you… thinking about the things I wanted to do to you… I would get so wet. Just as wet as I am right now. Have I ever… made you hard before? This is a weird time to play coy, you know. Fine, Mr. Delicate Flower, you don’t have to say it out loud if you don’t want to. But feeling you… so hard, pressing against me… even if this *is* the first time… it’s perfect. I… I want to put you inside now. Is that okay? I know you… don’t feel well, so I’ll do all the work. I’ll be slow and gentle. I just… I’m so sick of hiding how I feel. I want to be close to you. The closest I can possibly be. [loving – she’s touched by his concern] What? No. No, you don’t have to make me cum. That’s okay. We’ll worry about that later. It might not feel like it, but… we have plenty of time. Right now… I just want to focus on you. I want to make you feel good. This is the worst day of your life, and… maybe I can take your mind off of it. Just for a little bit. I love you. I’ve been ready for this for… a really long time. So… are you ready for me? Alright. Let me just reach down and… [he’s in – they make love slowly, quietly, tenderly] Oooooh! Oh, god. Yes, that’s… that’s it. Let me push back and… mmm… take all of you. Oh… oh ****. That’s… that’s so good. Oh my god. Just… just stop right there. I just want to sit here with… with all of you inside me. Oh… holy shit. You’re twitching. I can feel every inch of you twitching inside of me. God, it’s like… little fireworks. Makes my heart flutter. I feel so… *full* of you. In the obvious way, yeah, but… I feel you in my soul. In my heart. This is… I can’t find the words. This is perfect. *We* are perfect. Oh, Jesus. Just let me… rock back… and forth. ****, I… ****, that feels so good. To slowly grind against you… feeling you push in and pull back out… slowly… rubbing against you… ****, ****, oh my god. Can you feel me… gripping you as you pull out? Holding on to you as you slide out so slowly… and pulling you back in? God, I’m… I’m squeezing you so hard. I can’t help it. I can’t… my body is moving on its own. I want you so badly. You… you make me so wet. Oh fffffuck. Here, let me… let me pull my knees up a bit so I can go… a little faster. Just… oh, yes, just like that. Please… wrap your arms around me. Hold me close. Hold me like you’ll never let go. Oh ****… you’re so hard. You’re so hard for me. Jesus… every thrust drives me crazy. *You* drive me crazy. Oh ****, ****, oh my god, yes, yes, yes. [breathless] You’re… you’re close? Good. I… ****, I want it. No, it’s okay. It’s okay, baby. You… you can cum inside. I took my pill. It’s okay. Just… oh Jesus Christ. Just feel it. Feel it building up. Concentrate on how good it feels. Focus on me. Focus on you and me. Together. Oh… oh ****. ****, **** yes, oh my god. I love you. I love you so much. Let it go, baby. Give it to me. Let go and cum for me. Cum inside me. Cum in me. Cum! Cum! Yes! Yes, baby! That’s it. Keep cumming. Oh, god… I can feel it. I can feel you pulsing. Oh, ****… that feels incredible. Jesus… yes, that’s it baby. Every drop. Give it to me. I want all of you. Oh ****. Oh… oh my god. [gasping] That… that was beautiful. *You’re* beautiful. Oh god… kiss me. Whew… I’m out of breath! Emotions are exhausting. No, no, just… just leave it in for a minute. I… I like feeling you there. I like being… connected to you. So… now you know how I feel. How I’ve always felt. As far as I’m concerned… you’re the only person in the world. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I was just… scared. You mean so much to me, and… I guess I still didn’t trust myself not to screw it up. But… you were brave for me before, and now it’s my turn to be brave for you. [heartfelt] I love you. That’s the truth. I love you, and this thing you’re going through… it kills me. You can get through it, but you’ll have to be strong. And I know… I know you don’t feel very strong right now. I can’t say I’m the strongest person in the world, either. But… listen to me. It’s not just you anymore. We’re in this together. I’ll give you every ounce of strength I have. I promise you: we’re going to get through this together. Together, we’re unstoppable. We can move mountains. We’re not going to give up. Never. [quietly] Tomorrow, we’ll call those numbers and start talking about treatment. We’ll get you on a schedule, buy everything you need, and start you down the path to recovery. But for now… shhh. Just rest. Wrap your arms around me and hold me tight. Just… be here with me. Feel my heart beating against yours. We’ll stay here like this for as long as we can. [whispering] Don’t be afraid. I’m here. I’ll always be here. -----[END]-----